Sex

Maintain a Deep Level of Intimacy and Connection

I am continuing to share the ideas of Sexual Empowerment and how to “bring out the goddess within.”

You can refer to previous posts for more details or purchase the complete copy of the ebook, SEXUAL EMPOWERMENT: Bring Out The Goddess Within.

When you are ready, you can move forward with the Basic Sacred Sex Techniques.

BASIC SACRED SEX TECHNIQUES

MAINTAIN A DEEP LEVEL OF INTIMACY AND CONNECTEDNESS.

Gaze into each other’s eyes as much as possible. Shower your lover’s face, neck, and shoulders with soft kisses and whisper words of love and encouragement. Help each other feel loved, desired and wanted.

SLOW IT DOWN.

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What is Tantra and How Does It Relate to Sex

SACRED SEX/TANTRA SEX

Although it is relatively new to the United States, tantra sex has long been practiced in many Eastern cultures. Tantra originated in India more than 6,000 years ago and emerged as a rebellion against organized religions that held the belief that in order to achieve enlightenment, sexuality should be rejected. Tantra philosophy purporting that sexuality was a doorway to the divine and that earthly pleasures, such as eating, dancing, and creative expression were sacred acts.

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Eliminate the work and stress from sex

HOW DO WE BEGIN TO EMPOWER OURSELVES SEXUALLY?

Eliminate the work and stress from sex:

1. Communication. It is very important to communicate with your partner in a gentle, non-threatening manner. Always approach sexual topics with an open mind and an open heart.

Questions to discuss with your partner:

How would you describe the type of communication you have with your partner?

Do you feel comfortable sharing intimate feelings and ideas with your partner?

Do you communicate during an argument or does it escalate to the point of no return?

How do you end up resolving a conflict–through passive-aggressive means until it fades away or are you comfortable talking about how to resolve the issue at hand?

Do you feel like you can share your sexual fantasies with your partner?

Do you know how to communicate with your partner in a loving, compassionate way?

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Empower Your Sexuality!

Did you know?

One out of three couples suffer from a low sex drive.

Twenty percent of married couples have sex less than ten times a year.

Low sex drive is the number one complaint brought to sex therapists.

Fifty percent of the population are lacking sexual desire.

Why is healthy, active, fulfilling sex missing in so many relationships? Are we too busy with life? Too tired? Too stressed? Headaches or “just not feeling very good?”

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Affairs and Emotional Needs

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I had a great conversation on Facebook with many of my friends about what constitutes an affair. The feedback and conversation that started was awesome. This video is an extension of that dialogue and pinpoints what I have seen in my practice. I’m hoping it will help individuals understand what’s at the nucleus of the affair and why people have affairs. Please leave comments   🙂

 

Today want to do my video blog on affairs. I see it a lot. Its men and women. The divorce rate is really kinda pushing up there. It fluctuates somewhat but it is definitely over fifty percent. And a lot of people I see are having affairs. They’re still in the marriage. They’re trying to continue the affair and continue the marriage because it’s so complicated at this point they don’t really know how to get out of the affair. And they don’t know how to bridge the place where they have to be open and honest in the marriage because oh my gosh…how would that look and how complicated could that potentially be right?

So I’m speaking to you today without judgement but just to give you some information that may help you understand why people have affairs. So when you find out that your spouse or partner or significant other is having an affair, what often happens is we get so hung up on the sexual aspect of it. Why are you having sex with them? What do they have that I don’t have? What kind of sex and how often?

Watch the complete video here.

Julianna Lyddon

Connect with Julianna

Connect with Julianna

 


Are you Getting your Needs Met?

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I want to talk about getting your needs met in your relationship. Let me tell you this is one that I see a lot. It has come up lately in my practice. So whatever happens I try to bring it up in my blog to provide some really helpful tips for people. But here’s the thing, whether you’re in a relationship and maybe your partner is having an affair, maybe they’re having a physical affair. Maybe you found out they are having an emotional affair. Maybe it’s not to that point but you’re in a relationship where you just feel dull. Where you just feel almost frozen, like nothing is really making a difference. You’re not feeling fully connected to that person you’re just kind of going through the motions.

 

I get a lot of people saying that “you know what?” I just have a roommate. I don’t feel like there is any chemistry, I don’t feel like there is any sexual energy between us. We just kind of live together and take care of each other. Because we do care about one another but we’ve lost that kind of passion.

 

So no matter what your issue is you know there’s something wrong in your relationship and the first thing I have to say here is to reach out and get the support you need.

Listen to the complete video here:

 

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Julianna Lyddon

Connect with Julianna

Connect with Julianna


Are you thinking about moving in together or getting married?

 

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Hi its Julianna Lyddon here and so today I want to talk about something that came up my classroom. I teach college kids, incoming freshmen in Arizona and today we were talking a little bit about habits and how we can stop behaviors before they become habitual and having that real awareness of what a habit is and how long it takes a habit to be actually formed and really getting in there and making that unnecessary shift.

Some of the kids brought up….. we have such great discussions …and some of them brought up this concept of relationships and marriages and how complicated that can be when two people have very specific habits. And how they come together in a relationship and how it can be extra difficult at eradicating or even really making the shift that’s very necessary so then the conversation kinda parlayed into someone asking if I believe in premarital counseling and so we had a discussion about that and I absolutely think that if individuals would go to see someone before they get married or even moved in together more marriages would be salvaged… would be saved.

Listen to the complete video here.

 

 

Julianna Lyddon

Connect with Julianna

Connect with Julianna

 


Four First Date No No’s

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In my coaching practice, I help many people navigate the dating world. It is a different game then it used to be. There are so many different ways to meet people with all of this online dating.  We really need to be cognizant of a few things. There are so many mistakes that people make that can be avoided.  So lets get to it.

  1.  When you are on a date be sure that you are not spending the entire time discussing all of the devastating,  disastrous dates you have had in the past. You would be surprised how many people do this and especially if you are talking about online dating and then they start sharing all of these horrific experiences and the other person says I don’t think I want to hear this, what is wrong with you. So be careful about doing that.
  2. Be careful about comparing the person you are on a date with to somebody else.  Often we come out of a relationship and we are so unhappy because maybe the individual broke up with us and we love them so much….that we cant stop thinking about them so everybody new we are with we are comparing and holding an opinion or a judgement. So go into that first date thinking that you are just going to have fun. You are going to live in the moment you are not going to spend too much time about what is going to happen in the future.  You are just going to have fun.  So you cant hold any preconceived notions here.
  3. I want you to be very very careful about talking about yourself too much…..

 

Watch the rest of the video here:

 

Julianna Lyddon

Connect with Julianna

Connect with Julianna


Sleeping in separate beds….is it good for your relationship?

 

As couples, should we sleep in separate bedrooms?  

Okay here’s the thing, almost 26% of us say that they do sleep in separate bedrooms.  And there are a myriad of reasons for this.  Some of us have restless leg syndrome, some of our partners snore, some have sleep apnea and have that apparatus to help them sleep.  Some have a hard time getting to sleep and are getting up and down a lot.  Some have different work schedules.  The 26%, those that said that they do sleep in separate bedrooms don’t like to talk about it, they are embarrassed about it and feel judged. And people feel that if you are sleeping in separate bedrooms, their marriage must really be on the rocks.  Well I am here to tell you that those I have spoken with, who have made the decision to sleep in separate bedrooms are so much happier.  Here’s the key, the quality of life issue is what we are dealing with here.  If you cannot get a restful night of sleep and its happening to you more than a couple of times a week, its going to affect you on many facets of your life. 

Listen to the full video!

 

Julianna Lyddon

Connect with Julianna

Sleeping in separate beds....is it good for your relationship?

 


The World of Relationships

The World of Relationships

The world of relationships

through my lens

has been awe inspiring.

The stories I hear, the amazing people I meet, the pain I witness, the triumphs I get to admire and the healing I help assist with have all contributed to my life in a beautiful way.

I see a lot of women, all ages. I listen to story after story and they all have similar roots. It sometimes feels like a revolving door.

I often say…”I just heard this same scenario with the last woman”. These stories and issues are all about dating and finding love.

We all want and need to be loved. It’s part of the human condition. It scares us to death to think of spending our whole life alone.

The view through my lens is this……

We live in a time where we have conditioned ourselves to put sex before the emotional connection. Women and even our teens are accustomed to this behavior. This post is not about judging when we have sex with someone, but it is about learning to stand in our sexual power! This is a real issue that has gotten to epidemic proportions and is truly affecting women of all ages, but predominately our youth.

My advice…TALK, TALK and TALK more about sex with your kids. Click To Tweet

I hear stories from many women, but the ones that concern me the most are the ones from the teenagers. They have such a NEED to be loved and accepted and fit in. Young girls are having sex in very casual settings and frequently because it’s what has become expected. They believe this is what they “should” do to get a boy to like them. The worst part is how they feel afterwards. They talk about feeling used and disconnected from themselves and the boy. Often there is little to no conversation, making it even more awkward. When asked about details of the experience, they often say they didn’t even like it, but know that the boy did.

Somewhere along the way the message is not getting through, the conversations are not happening or maybe we just don’t know how to begin to talk about such a vulnerable, sensitive subject. Imagine a young woman who grows up giving herself away to one boy after another and each time feeling horrible about herself because she thinks this is what love is. She believes that sex and love are the same. She lives in silence feeling shameful and worthless at times. Nobody talked to her about how sex and love are different and what it means to emotionally connect with someone on a deep level. Nobody ever told her that sex truly is beautiful and to honor her sexuality as a gift. She grows up believing that sex is about the act and the orgasm and that if the boy shows he’s sexually attractive to her, then she is beautiful. Now imagine you as an adult woman and you are still entangled in this same maze. You begin to wonder what is wrong with you and often feel depressed and left thinking…”why do I feel unloveable?” Nothing is wrong with this woman except that she was never told about how to integrate the sexual piece of herself into her identity. It’s conveniently left out of the family conversations. We shy away from it and say things like…”keep your legs closed” or don’t act like a slut” or even another extreme, we push our girls to have a boyfriend because we, as mothers, want them to be popular. I could write forever on this subject.

There is so much work to be done here and it’s all about self worth. We are sexual beings and when we are not educated about this beautiful part of ourselves (boys included), we come through life wounded in a very deep way.

 

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